I've never been honest to myself ever since..i do not know when. Being around with judgemental people who expect u to be pure & innocent is just tiring..
If you know me well enough u would know by now i'm one of da most rebellious person in ur life(anyone's life). Nothing can change me not even my parents.
I'm not trying to push the blame to anyone, i don't always blame the others, i reflect on my own mistakes too. But, if u do not know me, u probably think that i have so much ego that i will never admit that i am wrong.
I've always been tortured over and over again about this issue, it's like stabbing on my wound over and over again. I truely clearly know what i did but WHY am i the one to be blamed for everything that had happened. Why don't people just look at the core of the problems, how the problems started...? I was honest, and i was being judged. I was honest, i was being treated badly. I was honest, and all i heard was the hurtful words which has already reached my limits.
Is that a way to change me? by bringing it up over and over again? U know u can't change me like dis.

...and...
Ever since then, i never voice out my truest feelings anymore.
I never show my trueself anymore.
I just can't be myself anymore.

I'm not as forgiving as i thought. I remember it.